feeling alive

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Am not sure why people can be so hurtful but also why they believe it's acceptable,yet are more than happy with you when you are in front of them,that's a lesson i have learned and trying not to let it get to me that someone seems to think it's more than ok to be nasty,guess what it's their problem not mine.
My confidence is growing most days and that is in some way down to the amazing friends i have who are restoring my faith in me,since the beginning of this year my best friend Kim said i should write sayings on my walls to remind of different things and to keep me strong in mind, body and soul,if truth be known i was starting to become a little lazy in certain ways not always doing make up or my hair on, regardless of how i looked i never stopped being or knowing i was a woman and was not doing anything different to every other woman who have days when they dress down,for me i love wearing make up and having my hair on and wearing skirts and dresses i am a true girly girl and that is who i am and the kind of woman i am.
Kim always tell me i look stunning when meet up and now i have other people are telling me exactly the same,i know i come out of my shell alot more when have skirt hair and make up done but i feel so alive and don't want the day to end,Sean at snooker club was nicely surprised when he saw me with my make up and skirt on and we had a lovely chat again even another lady was asking questions and was genuinely interested but i love being asked anything and love when people are willing to get to know the answers for them selves.
Shelley saw me in skirt and make up a couple of weeks ago and her first words were You've got legs,You've got legs later finding out she meant i had lovely legs and looked so much better when i am in my skirt and make up.
There have been times when have been out with Kim or Shelley and not having the right footwear has hindered my confidence but as soon as i have my brown or black ankle boots on my confidence soars sky high,i have found myself wearing make up and skirts nearly every day this week although i did have a relaxing day at home on Wednesday in my PJ's and not having to do certain things was nice but i do love doing my make up and get my hair right even selecting outfit i will wear that day makes so much of a difference,i have now found out i have more friends than i ever truly thought i would have when i knew my life had to change there were times when i was worrying that i would be on my own and struggle being accepted for the woman i always knew i was.
It is Kim and mine's 50th birthday next month and we have a night out in Leeds planned with hopefully lots of the lovely friends we have coming along even if only for a couple of hours it would be amazing to get to meet people in person for a change and not just online or in messages,i am looking forward to the party night out and have already worked out what i will be wearing and it will be a night to remember or forget depending on how things go,i will be letting my hair down for a change here's to a great night out but also a great year have already ticked 2 or 3 on my bucket list and only made it just over a month ago.
Here's to a bright happy wonderful future yes i finally feel alive and living life to the full 
Lots of Love 
Angie 
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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